When I first started this ‘diet’ oh those many months ago, I decided my initial goal weight would be 140.  Today, I’ve reached that goal.  Now, I’m probably going to set a new goal.  I think the goal should be about 135 - a weight I found easy to maintain in my twenties.  Adam thinks it should be 125 - a weight I found easy to maintain in my teens before I could drive (i.e. sit on my ass all day).

If I make it to 135 by my birthday, I’ll reassess.  Although I will admit at 140, I feel a ‘little’ pudgy.

On my path to 140, I made the dire mistake of seeing another dietitian.  I know, I know - the definition of crazy is doing the same thing again and again, but expecting a different result.  You see, I was under the impression from my doctor and other doctors, that if I lost all this weight, then my cholesterol would plunge.  I’ve given up cheese, butter, all my favorites — but my cholesterol stubbornly stays at the grotesquely high level of before.

So, my doctor recommended I see the dietitian in her office — perhaps we could all figure out the cholesterol issue together.  Now, you see how I’m back to the crazy.

I dutifully made my appointment, and left work (don’t get all excited — it’s another temporary job) early to meet here.  Do they clone these women somewhere.  If I have to see another anorexic looking bleached blond to get nutrition advice, I’m going to scream.

Needless to say, it didn’t go well.

Anorexic Dietitian: So what do you eat.

Annoyed Dieter (a.k.a. me): About 800 - 1000 calories a day on this diet.

AD:  It’s not a diet.  It’s a lifestyle change.

Me: What can I do to lower my cholesterol:

AD: You should pull the skin off chicken.  Also avoid fast foods and trans fats.

Me: I don’t eat processed food, any other advice.

AD: You should add lean meats to your diet.  Have you considered conveniently pouched tuna?

Me: I don’t eat processed food, any other advice.

AD: You should consider adding more fiber to your diet.  Beans, perhaps.  High fiber cereal.

Me: I’ll consider the beans, but cooking beans is time consuming.

AD: They come in a can, you know.

Me: I don’t eat processed food, any other advice.

AD: Of course, you should also try All Bran Bran buds.  They are particularly high in soluble fiber.

Me: I’ve done an exhaustive search of cereals, and I don’t eat high fructose corn syrup - are you sure this is healthy?

AD: Absolutely.   Here are some shopping lists of processed foods you can buy from several different local stores.

Me: Aaargh (ok, that was internal - but, you know?)

So, of course, I’m thinking - perhaps I had missed this cereal.  I will never eat All Bran Bran Buds.  Why?  The answer is obvious.  The second ingredient - sugar.  The fifth ingredient - high fructose corn syrup.

All I’m thinking - is do I have to pay for this?  My insurance won’t cover this and I received no value from this experience.  If I wanted magazine type advice - I would have picked up a $3.95 magazine.

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